It’s been a while since we posted a general update about the status of submissions to the Coulrophobia anthology. We had hoped to have all our responses out by now, but alas, work and life and other such things intervened. As of the moment, we have responded with either a hold or a pass to all Coulrophobia story submissions received on or before 5/27/15. We are considering the clown facts separately, and we have not responded to the majority of those one way or the other yet. As often happen, the bulk of our submissions came in within the last few days of our submission window, so we still have quite a few stories to work through. Thank you all for you patience, and for sending us such wonderful work. We’ll do our best to get back to you as soon as possible. If you sent us a story on or before 5/27, and you haven’t heard back from us, please query.
Well, as frequently happens, pesky things like day jobs and server problems have gotten in the way of fun things, like clowns. As a result, we’re running a bit behind on our promised 4 week response time for Unlikely Coulrophobia submissions. At the moment, we’ve responded to everything received on or before May 3, 2015. Everything else is still in the queue. If you received an initial response from us saying that we got your story, then rest assured it is in good hands and we’ll get back to you as soon as we can. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for sending us so many wonderful stories. We can’t wait to share this anthology with you!
As for the Unlikely Academia issue, our aim is to publish it in July. We’ll do our best to keep you all updated.
It’s been a long wait, but we’re delighted to announce the Table of Contents for the upcoming Journal of Unlikely Academia. We received a lot of excellent submissions, and we had some difficult choices to make, but we promise it’s worth the wait. It’s going to be a wonderful issue and we can’t wait to share it with you, which we’ll be doing in early July. So, when July rolls around, you’ll be able to read the following stories (in no particular order) featuring the unlikely world of academia, learning, and the things people do in the pursuit of knowledge…
Follow Me Down by Nicolette Barischoff
And Other Definitions of Family by Abra Staffin-Wiebe
Candidate 45, Pensri Suesat by Pear Nuallak
The Dauphin’s Metaphysics by Eric Schwitzgebel
The Librarian’s Dilemma by E. Saxey
Minotaur: An Analysis of the Species by Sean Robinson
Soteriology and Stephen Greenwood by Julia August
The Shapes of Us, Translucent to Your Eye by Rose Lemberg
So, please join us in July for The Journal of Unlikely Academia. It’s going to be fabulous, and we can’t wait for you to read it.
Do you find clowns to be a) creepy b) downright terrifying c) mildly amusing d) laugh out loud funny e) some combination of the above or f) none of the above (please supply your own alternate adjective/description)?
E. I think clowns are kind of creepy, which is probably why I also find them funny. My instinct to laugh at anything eerie and unnerving is probably not going to serve me well if I ever end up in any kind of horror movie scenario.
On a related note, what is you earliest clown-related memory, and how did it scar you and or shape your view of clowns?
To be honest, I don’t think it ever occurred to me to find clowns frightening OR funny as a kid. I loved playing dress-up, and clowns were just another kind of costume. The first clown I ever saw was probably Ronald McDonald and he provided the chicken nuggets, so I suspect I was okay with him.
My first really specific clown memory, though – and one that directly influenced this story — was actually an art project from second or third grade. Our teacher taught us how to draw happy and sad clowns and told us we could pick which kind we wanted to draw. I don’t think I’d ever seen a sad clown at that point, so they seemed way more interesting.
What lead you to take the particular approach to clowns you used in your story, Break the Face in the Jar by the Door?
Initially, I’d hoped to write a scary story, actually — I’m a huge fan of Pennywise. But everything I tried ended up feeling hopelessly derivative, so I shifted gears. I got to thinking about those sad clowns I used to draw and somehow that connected with this other ghost of a story I had in my head, where this woman in an emotionally abusive relationship starts making the first steps to taking control back. At first — less imaginatively — I thought maybe the daughter was drawing sad clowns herself, but I realized the story was a lot more interesting if she just woke up as a clown one day. Cause I figure, clowns are creepy because you can’t trust the expressions painted on their faces. This time, though, the clown is intrinsically honest. It’s everyone else who’s lying.
Unrelated to clowns (or not, as the case may be), what else are you working on/have you published recently/have upcoming that you’d like people to know about?
I’ve been working on a trilogy of fairy tales retold as noir stories. I’m pretty excited about them — they’ve been a kick to write. “The Case of the Little Bloody Slipper” will appear this October in The Book Smugglers. The subsequent sequels will appear in November and December, respectively.
Do you find clowns to be a) creepy b) downright terrifying c) mildly amusing d) laugh out loud funny e) some combination of the above or f) none of the above (please supply your own alternate adjective/description)?
It really depends on the clown and what they happen to be doing at the time. A clown doing some juggling at the state fair? Amusing! A clown with red eyes and pointy teeth knocking on the window of my car? Significantly less amusing.
On a related note, what is you earliest clown-related memory, and how did it scar you and or shape your view of clowns?
When I was two years old, my mom made me a clown costume for Halloween. She spent a lot of time working on it, and it was kind of big, so I wore it for Halloween three years in a row. Maybe I developed a profound empathy for clowns, having been one myself. . . or maybe the costume had no impact on me whatsoever.
What lead you to take the particular approach to clowns you used in your story, Everyone’s a Clown?
I was looking around for ideas for clown flash stories, and decided to start by searching for clown songs on YouTube. Eventually I found a video of “Everybody Loves A Clown” where a little girl stands and stares at Gary Lewis while he sings the entire song. It was actually kind of creepy to have a kid just stand there and stare, like she could see something I couldn’t--and that was the seed for the story.
Unrelated to clowns (or not, as the case may be), what else are you working on/have you published recently/have upcoming that you’d like people to know about?
I actually do have another clown story! “The Carnival Was Eaten, All Except the Clown,” appeared in the final issue of Electric Velocipede and was later podcast at The Drabblecast.
I also have several stories that have nothing to do with clowns. “Four Seasons in the Forest of Your Mind” is forthcoming in the May/June issue of Fantasy & Science Fiction, and I recently did a “Tasting Menu” of food-related flash stories at Daily Science Fiction. I have a complete list of my publication on my website.
Clowns: The Unlikely Coulrophobia Remix is hot off the presses! So get your hot, pressed clowns today! Or if you prefer your clowns cold-pressed, never fear. A clown is nothing if not adaptable.
22 tales to horrify and delight, by authors Derek Manuel, T. Jane Berry, J.H. Pell, Jeff Wolf, Kristen Roupenian, Carolyn M. Yoachim, Mari Ness, Evan Dicken, Carlie St. George, Line Henriksen, Virginia M. Mohlere, Dayle A. Dermatis, Jason Arias, Joe Nazarre, Karlo Yeager-Rodruigez, Sara K. McNeilly, Chris Kuriata, Cassandra Khaw, Cate Gardner, Charles Payseur, Chillbear Latrigue, and Holly Schofield, with an introduction by Robin Blyn and illustrations by Bryan Prindiville.
Unlikely Story